Done? (Ecc 3:1)

I might be done with blogging... at least for now.

Last week, I had something to say... something interesting. Something that might have actually been worth sharing. A topic in the news was making my blood boil. It was controversial, and the loudest voices were the  ones who said they were speaking for me, representing my wishes. They were wrong. I disagreed. 
I drafted my comments in my head for 2 days. But I didn't have time to type them. 
And now...now it's too late.
What I had to say is no longer relevant. 

Which got me thinking about this blog.
I've struggled a lot with the purpose of blogging. I'm not one of those self-absorbed divas who actually thinks everyone wants to know what she's thinking. What I am is a "verbal processor" - I do my best thinking in words. I actually like feedback. And sometimes I just have to write to organize my thoughts.

You've probably noticed I'm don't exactly leap into the controversial stuff that keeps some blogs ticking. That's not because I don't have opinions, but rather because I'm not willing to stir up trouble here. Not in a one-sided conversation with only emoticons and italics to establish my tone. No, if I'm going to make people mad, I'd like to do it in person. If I'm going to try to change someone's mind, it's not going to be from my couch  - unless they are on the other end, and we've got a bottle of wine between us.

So that brings me back to some hard questions... 

Who reads my blog? Only my friends. People I can just call, and have an actual conversation with. 
A blog is a very one-sided conversation.

If I want wider reader-ship (and I'm not altogether sure I do), then I have to have something to say that connects to something other than myself and my life. Or I have to have a new way to say the same old things. Popular bloggers I follow write about family and housework and the tedium of day-to-day life, sure. But they do it in an interesting and unique way.

I'm not that original.

Why do people read my blog? I'm not sure, but I think it might be because they like talking to me, or because they want to know more about what's going on with me than a facebook status-update can explain. I know it's not because I'm all that profound or entertaining. 

I also know I'm not concise. And I am hard to catch on the phone. So maybe this "open journal" does serve a purpose. Keeping me connected to the rest of my world. Or maybe I'm becoming something of a diva after all. 

So... I'm going to cool it on the blog for a while. And work on building relationships in the real world. If you want to know what's up with me, call. Message me on facebook. Or e-mail. Send me a card. If you're in my time-zone, drop by for a visit.

Thanks for reading. I'll let you know when I'm back.

There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under the heavens. - Ecclesiastes 3:1

A Woman With A Plan (Prov 31:25)

I posted in October about "moving forward" by setting goals and making a plan to meet them. 
The question that set me off on that one was "How will your life be better next year than it is today?"

At the time, I was shocked to realize how much I'd just been "coasting" through my own life. So I set some goals. Made some plans. I discovered that I'd been afraid that planning ahead meant that in some way I was trying to do God's job. After all, Jesus explicitly said "don't worry about tomorrow." 

However, He also told us to be good stewards of our resources. Undoubtedly our time on Earth is one of our most precious resources. If we're going to use that time well, we have to have an eye to the future. 

Last week a friend asked me what my 5-year plan looked like.

Never in my life have I had a 5-year plan, unless you count graduating from high school. I don't actually think I can take credit for planning that, though. It's not like I had a choice. My parents always made it clear that I would graduate. If anything, it was their plan.

After high school I went to community college for 2 years, because I had a scholarship. 

Then I took a year off. School had always been easy for me. I wanted to really care about my education before I actually started to pay for it. The year off turned into 5. That wasn't planned. It just turned out that college was more expensive than I'd thought.


In year 2 of my "off time" I moved to WA. I was going to stay for two years, then move somewhere else (or return to CO).  I stayed in WA for 13 years.

When I finally went back to college, I had a three-year plan. Finish my degree, then get my teaching certificate (a 5th year program). I really didn't think beyond that. As I came to the end of my program I had a major meltdown over the idea of signing a contract for a year. I din't know if I could commit to working in one school, one district for that long. It took my advisor most of a box of tissues to persuade me that a school-year - 180 days - was well within my comfort zone.


180 days. 10 months. I could do anything for 10 months.With my mentor's advice ringing in my ears, I took a job in a small district I didn't expect to be a good fit.  I stayed there for 7 years.

Turns out I'm better at long-term than I thought I was.

So, now I'm thinking about my five-year plan. 
I'm writing it in pencil, because I've learned that sometimes things change in surprising ways. I know that God's the only one with a clear view of the future. I trust that His plan is the best plan. 

I also know that I can handle Him changing my plans. In October, one of the goals I set for myself was to be jogging in a 5K this spring. Then I broke my leg in December, and had to take that goal off the list (for now). It wasn't the end of the world. I'd never stopped to realize it, but one of my strengths is adapting.

Five years from now-ish... 
I'll be debt-free (except maybe that student loan).
I'll have dozens of new memories of adventures with my family. Parades. Birthdays. Dances. Soccer. TBall. Basketball. Lakes. Beaches.
I'll have a dog who loves to go walking/running with me. Loves taking car trips. Loves my nieces and nephew.
I'll be involved in my local church leadership again.

That's it so far. Not a bad start. 
There's more in my head, but I've still got to separate wishes (travel!) from plans (writing). And I know some things are totally out of my control. But in as far as I am able, I'm going to work to make the future count!

She is strong and respected and not afraid of the future. -Proverbs 31:25

Live your passions... (PS 139:14)

Last week author and speaker Keith Ferrin launched his new book 10 Tips for Liking the Bible (because believing its true is not enough). Click on the title to check it out on Amazon. (You can even look for blythegirl's review!) It's a great book. I strongly recommend it, and the study guide. In fact, I got to preview it, as part of his launch team.

Today on his blog, KeithFerrin.com, he talked about how fulfilling life is when you live your passions. I believe that. Why shouldn't I? The proof is everywhere. 

Check out "Designs By Jennie" on Facebook!

My physical therapist is great at her job, because she is passionate about healing. Yesterday, the teacher across the hall shared about a documentary she'd seen about teaching - recognizing it's a calling more than a career. I have a cousin who's made a career out of helping young women overcome obstacles and develop their self-worth. Four of my dearest friends have even found ways to support themselves through art. 

Cool, eh? Digital art! Wow. 

Of course, passions don't always come with a particular job. My mom's passion is for random people and their stories. She loves listening to them and figuring out how to make their day a little better. That's why she was great as a waitress, and why she's enjoying her new career as an LPN. I have a friend, who happens to be a teacher, but whose real passion is helping kids with cancer. She dedicates much of her spare time to supporting and fundraising for this important cause. My sister's passion is for relationships. She loves making people happy, and spends her free time crafting cute customized monkeys. One of my favorite people is passionate about helping people with dietary restrictions find the numminess that most of us take for granted.

Facebook's "Gluten Free Princess" is a foodie extraordinaire!

There is nothing quite like finding that place where you "click."
We were each made with a very unique set of skills, talents, interests, and abilities.  Every single one of us has something we care about deeply; something that makes our hearts sing with joy or our blood boil in frustration. Embracing that enriches us. 

Check out the Olympia PubCrawl Page. They do good things.

Your passion makes you... well, you. Embrace that. Even if all the other passionate, crazy people in your world are making you nuts, give yourself a minute to stop, recognize, and enjoy. Even if you can only enjoy your passion part time, or for a few minutes a day, or when everyone else is asleep, do it! Then, give thanks to the God who made you. 

Wanna make someone smile? Send 'em a Punky Monkey!

Ready? Repeat after me:
I'm good at _____________.  Other people are blessed when I am ______________. I was made to ____________. 
God is smiling right now.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well! -Psalm 139:14

Time-OUT! (Mk 2:27)

A few weeks ago I made myself an outline of topics I wanted to write about for the next few weeks. My goal was to become more consistent, and to find a rhythm in my posting. I deliberately decided to ignore trickier issues like voice, relevance, and whether or not the world really needs another blogger. I enjoy writing, and I decided that it was my privilege to inflict my opinions on anyone crazy enough to read them. After all, if the title of this blog doesn't say "enter at your own risk," I think you  may want to revisit the definition of "insignificant."

So I have this outline. A to-do list, if you will.

This week was supposed to be about loving what you do. Burning the midnight oil. Having a passion for your job. It seemed like a good fit for a week that included parent-teacher conferences. I even got Jennie to make me some art! (Go, check out her website. She does some cool stuff).

I was right in theory. This week was exhausting. The midnight oil was burnt, refilled, and burnt again. I even wrote two posts about conferences earlier this week, just to vent. (Scroll down, they should be showing).

But now that the week is done, and I've survived, I'm not feeling very passionate about work. In fact, I'm feeling rather drained.

Which could be a problem, since the schedule says to write about passion.
Then again, maybe not. After all, true passion does leave us exhausted. Spent.
Perhaps because we are not able to live very long at that level of intensity. We have to have time to recharge. Reset.

God made us that way. He warned us to make time to rest. He specifically set aside one day in every week for unwinding. He even modeled it for us. "On the seventh day He rested." - Genesis 2:2.

I'm sure there's something God could have been doing that first Sabbath day. Something on His eternal to-do list. Something He could have been tweaking, improving, making better than "good." He did get right back to work on the 8th day, without an alarm clock or snooze alarm (though I'd like to believe He at least had some coffee!), because there was still plenty to be done.

That's the point, really. There's always more to be done. There's a huge gulf between "good enough" and "excellent." As much as I'd like to be excellent, all the time, at everything (and my mom will be happy to tell you I've always been that way), I'm learning that sometimes I have to accept "good enough."

So today's the day I'll rest and reset. I've already gone for a walk. I've read a book. I'm giving myself time and permission to just do whatever I want. Which will probably include folding the laundry and cleaning the kitchen, not because they are on some to-do list, or because they have to be done, but because having things clean and organized makes me feel rested.

Then tomorrow afternoon, when I take out my school-bag, I'll be able to feel the excited anticipation of renewed enthusiasm.

Thank you, Jesus, for reminding me of the real reason for the fourth commandment.

Then He said to them "The sabbath was made for man, not man for the sabbath."  -Mk2:27 (NIV)

On moving forward... (Prov. 9:12)

Last Friday, a member of the local Sherrif's department came to give an assembly for all the 5th graders at my school. Most of these 5th graders have been with our school for many years. More than half of them come from "challenging" backgrounds. For them, 5th grade really marks a crucial dividing line. Up until now, the deputy reminded them, they've been surrounded by people who know them well, and are working with them, as they develop their characters. Next year begins a whole new era of personal accountability.

At the heart of his presentation was a message about setting goals and working toward them. He shared how he is working to further his education, taking online classes at night after getting home at 2a.m.. He told the kids that his drive was to be a better person, husband, father, friend, officer next year than he was this year.

Of course, that's what we all want, isn't it? To be a better person next year? To develop as human beings? It certainly is what God wants for us.

Yet how many of us really stop to examine our personal, long-term goals - regularly - and work toward them faithfully? I know I don't. Not that I don't set goals. Or accomplish things. As any one who's known me long can tell you, when I make my mind up to do something, it gets done.

Unless it doesn't.

Usually the "doesn't" covers the things that actually would improve me as a person. I can plan for a vacation, no problem. This summer I checked at least 3 items off my bucket list. But there are some long-term goals I've had for a while that I've done next-to-nothing about. 

Yes, progress is being made.
But don't ask how long those cups have been around. 

So, I realized I'm not a novelist about a year after I bought this magazine.
But I am an essayist. And much of the same logic/discipline applies.

I've yet to meet a Christian who really felt they "got" Revelation.
I keep meaning to *really* study it. And the prophets. Oh, and the law.
Clearly, I could certainly spend more time  internalizing God's message to His children.
(Book by a friend, Keith Ferrin, available at this link.)

The uncomfortable truth is that I'm much better with short term goals than long term ones. Accomplishing things keeps life interesting, and makes me feel like I'm getting somewhere. Sometimes I am. But not having long-term goals is the same as refusing to look at the bigger picture. And God created us as eternal beings. There's no avoiding the fact that life is lived long-term.

Of course, long term goals require a plan. And some patience. Not to mention perserverence. Those are 3 p's I really struggle with (believe it or not!). Thank goodness for prayer. Because when it comes to thinking long-term, I know I need God's help.

So I'm carving out time today to consider the deputy's questsion: "How will I be a better person next year than I am today?" I already have a couple of ideas. Based on my history with short-term goals, I am confident that, God willing, I can achieve it.

And won't that be a day to celebrate?! 

You are the one who will profit if you have wisdom; and if you reject it, you are the one who will suffer.

(HA! You were expecting 1Cor9:24, weren't you? I thought about it. Really I did.)           -Proverbs 9:12 And if I were you, I'd peek back at Proverbs 8, too.

New Year's Resolutions

It's cliched, I know, to make resolutions. It is much easier not to break resolutions you don't make, so that's been my thinking the last few years. Avoid failing myself by skipping the whole thing.

This year, though, I'm taking a braver stand. I'm declaring some goals for the year, and stepping forward in full confidence that I can and will do what I set out to do.

So, in 2012, I will give myself (at least) 1 hour each day.

15 minutes to write in a journal, memory book, story, or blog.

15 minutes to read something uplifting, inspiring, or otherwise edifying.

15 minutes to walk & breathe.

15 minutes to meditate on how much God loves me.

Now, obviously that's not much time for any of these. Ideally, I'll find myself so engrossed I'll spend a little more time in each worthy pursuit. Yet I sit here, thinking over the last month or so, and recognize that such a small commitment will be a HUGE improvement from my recent past.

To tell the truth, my last blog post (Nov. 10) was the last serious writing I did (unless you count the endless Christmas-card letters).  I *may* have logged a total of 60 minutes this month reading a couple inspirational works by CSLewis and Brennan Mannering. Maybe. Most of what I read over my Christmas break was cotton-candy for the brain. I read the YA series The Hunger Games. I read 5 of those short Christmas novellas that magically appear everywhere this time of year. I read 3 magazines: Oprah, People, and Saturday Evening Post. I read a mystery by James Patterson. I read some of my favorite children's Christmas books. As for walking and breathing... well... um, yea. I live just under two miles from one of the most gorgeous views around, but I can't tell you the date of the last time I walked down to see it.

I can't even tell you how far I've gotten from really feeling God's love. Gasp, if you will, but be honest.  I'm not saying I think God doesn't love me. I'm saying I've gotten so caught up in "my world" that I've forgotten how to see that love. I expect to write more on that as the year progresses. 

My resolutions are tiny. I will, most likely, miss a step every so often (in fact, I didn't walk today). But even little things make a big difference. Like a smile from a friend.  One extra "snooze" in the morning. A baby. A pair of comfy socks. A cup of coffee. 5mph on the freeway. So, a little bit at a time, I resolve to spend the next year getting closer to the me I want to be.